Michael Broadbent’s Efficient Dorm – Week 5

(Long story short, I was on spring break this week and thus didn’t really have the opportunity for any ‘efficient dorm’ progress.  Thus, I decided to get a bit… creative with my blog post.  Enjoy.)

Spring break.  An entire week off from college.  No worries about homework, classes, and even the magic of dorm living for a full 9 days.

I lie in my bed at home, looking forward to the days of rest that will soon come.  All is quiet and peaceful, except for the quiet hum of the heating system.  For a moment, all is bliss.

“MICHAEL ,WAIT!  HOLD ON! DID YOU REMEMBER TO UNPLUG THE MICROWAVE BEFORE YOU LEFT?” my brain suddenly screeches, jolting me awake.  I pause for a moment in thought.  Did I remember to unplug my microwave?  I know I emptied my fridge, turned off my clock, and brought my laptop home with me.  But the microwave.  Surely I didn’t forget something so obvious?

My room was closed for break, and thus I have no choice but to resist the urge to go check.  But for all I know, my microwave could be sitting there in my dorm, leeching energy.  ‘Do microwaves use that much electricity while idle?’ I wonder. ‘Surely they wouldn’t have to use that much, since they really only have to power the clock on the front, right?’   I quickly shake my head and shove the thought away.  No, it doesn’t matter how much energy it is really using.  It’s the principle of it!  I had gone through all that effort to make myself more energy efficient, and now I simply leave an appliance plugged in for over a week!  It’s unacceptable!

I get out of bed and begin pacing around my room.  There had to be a solution.  But what?  I quickly think of a couple plans.  One would be to break into the school, sneak into my dorm, and unplug the microwave.   That, however, would be both difficult and illegal.  Another, more rational, plan would be to call a friend who was able to keep their room over spring break and ask THEM to unplug it.

I reach for my phone, but stop just before dialing.  No, that wouldn’t work either.  They didn’t have my keys, and driving over to give it to them could potentially use more energy than I’d save.

It is at this point I realize that there is no way out.  I am simply a failure.  It is now the future, and I have failed.  The Apocalypse will not be averted, and it is all my fault.

Days pass.  I spend the rest of my spring break in agony.  Unable to think about anything other than the incredible amounts of energy waste which I was no doubt creating.  Any and all joy and relaxation is sapped from my being, my stay at home no longer being a paradise but a prison.

Finally, the ‘vacation’ comes to an end.  Not wasting any time, I gather my things and speed off back to my school, dashing up the stairs of my building faster than any would believe possible.  I ram my key into the lock and swing open the door to my room.  In one swift movement, I step inside and slide over to my microwave.

It is unplugged.

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